tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-83054750429045215062024-03-13T07:16:47.649-07:00The HeLLBouND filesHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-81948169630624518442011-08-26T11:05:00.000-07:002011-08-26T11:05:21.725-07:00A fine meshwork<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Hello,<div><br />
</div><div>It has been a long time since i have blogged. Largely because i have been busy in multiple things over the past months and i have not found a blog-worthy topic.</div><div><br />
</div><div>This is going to be a commentary (a rather opinionated one) largely on governance of India and the aspect of redundancy of governing institutions.</div><div><br />
</div><div>India is the largest democracy in the world and by being so, it incorporates the classic framework of democratic governance. I am talking about the the multiple overlapping branches of governance. There is the parliament with the upper and lower houses, there is the cabinet which is designated by the ruling party/alliance. There is the president (who, in Indian system does not have very strong powers except that of declaring emergencies). There is the judiciary who is appointed by the parliament. There is the police and the armed forces. In addition to this, there are independent bodies such as RAW, CBI, the election commission etc.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The most important reason why these work together in a democratic setting is the overlap and the redundancy among these institutions. Neither one of the above-mentioned institutions are singularly powerful over others. I.e. there is not one single body which does not have any interference (for a lack of a better word) from another. This is the key to having these work together in harmony. I should mention here that under conditions of Martial law, the president and the armed forces do become supremely powerful. But that's an exception.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The reason i am mentioning this redundancy is because of the recent events that have occurred in India about the so called 'Jan Lokpal Bill'. I am a novice in reading about bills and laws etc etc. But what i gathered from the Jan Lokpal Bill (JLB) is that the institution of Lokpal that people want created will end up having an absolute power over all the other institutions. And in my opinion, that will not be a good thing. Not that i am saying that the Govt Lokpal Bill is great. They are trying to give the Lokpal as few powers as possible in order to avoid scrutiny. But i think that JLB is aiming to create an absolute governance body. And that is undesirable.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The reason i said that redundancy is critical, is the fact that if there was one absolute institution, that can rise in power and become an effective dictatorship. Whereas, in a democracy, the only institution that can and should control governance is the people. So if the ultimate effective governance is from the people, then a question of dictatorship does not arise (unless there is a revolution). Another problem with having an absolute body is that, if that body becomes corrupt, then there is no stopping that. Take the example of the Nazis. The Nazis were in the beginning true to their name 'National socialist party'. But, because they were allowed to have an absolute power, Hitler could use that and turn the government into a dictatorship.</div><div><br />
</div><div>JLB is petitioning to create the Lokpal which will have jurisdiction over all other institutions. If the Lokpal becomes corrupt tomorrow, then all the other institutions will be under its control, which will make the system deviate from a true democracy, so i think that JLB as it is should not be passed. However, if created, the Lokpal will be a fresh institution and will prove to be effective in stemming corruption, as long as it does not have absolute power. Which brings me to my next point.</div><div><br />
</div><div>One of the caveats of the 'meshwork' of the democratic governance is that it is inherently prone to spreading corruption. Imagine a network of tubes filled with water. If you add a drop of ink to one of the nodes, it eventually spreads to the entire network. And such is our system. But then how will the Lokpal be effective? It will be effective by manipulating the same caveat. Now imagine a network of tubes filled with ink. Add a node full of bleach to it. The bleach from that node will spread throughout and start clearing the entire network. This is a very crude analogy, but in this case, the bleach will be the intent and anti-corruption activities of the public. So in my simple analogy, as long as there is a constant supply of bleach to this meshwork, the result should be effective clearance of ink.</div><div><br />
</div><div>The beauty of our governance system is that each node can be influenced by any other node without existence of a direct connection. To borrow a quote from a completely unrelated movie (Those of you who are avid fans, will recall), this is the system's greatest strength and the greatest weakness.</div><div><br />
</div><div>I shall end this post by urging all Indians to think objectively about what the JLB is proposing and also to not blindly follow it just because you want to steam off the anti-corruption emotions.</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
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</div></div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-78745463674363594382011-04-15T17:21:00.000-07:002011-04-15T17:21:35.958-07:00Music to my ears<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Hello,<br />
<br />
In about a month (in fact, less than), i will take my oral qualifying exams. I have to submit a 10-page proposal by end of the month, and about week after that, i have to defend it in front of my committee. Well, its a big exam (in some ways actually more important than your actual thesis defence).<br />
<br />
Anyway, the point is that i am doing everything but study for the exam. Mundane things like looking for apartments, labwork and cleaning the kitchen seem much more exciting than studying. But i think progressively i am getting better at preparing for the exam. One of the things which is helping me get through the boredom of this is, of course, music.<br />
<br />
Never has Pink Floyd been more appealing to my brain than now. Like I mentioned in the post 'Brain Damage' is becoming one of top 10 floyd songs for me. Ironically, 'Comfortably Numb' is one of the few being played the most. 'Stairway to heaven' and 'Whole lotta love' are reminding me of the sheer brilliance of Led Zeppelin. The Beatles with their 'A day in life', 'While my guitar gently weeps' and 'Come together' are adding to the harmony. These songs along with The Rolling Stones 'Stuck in the middle with you' and some southern swagger of Lynyrd Skynyrd's 'Free bird' are helping me forget the pain that this exam is. To add icing on the cake, Jimi Hendrix with 'Foxy lady' and 'All along the watchtower' and momentary change of tracks with some Aerosmith and Guns 'n Roses is satisfying my ears.<br />
<br />
The point being, once again, its classic rock which is helping me concentrate on my work (Well if you call it concentration if i blog randomly in the middle of reading a paper). Just wanted to write about the awesomeness of classic rock. To end this blog, I am going to use those immortal words by AC/DC.<br />
<br />
"For those about to rock, We salute you"<br />
<br />
Keep rockin'<br />
<br />
</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-60478073839365373772011-04-04T18:20:00.000-07:002011-04-04T18:20:46.706-07:00My poems to her<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><b>The beginning</b><br />
<br />
On the hilltop he waited<br />
Every shadow he saw<br />
Every footstep he heard<br />
He waited eagerly for her<br />
<br />
And then she came<br />
Her hair flowing in the wind<br />
Her eyes glowing<br />
She told him 'The wait is over'<br />
<br />
She brought colors<br />
He brought paper<br />
And thus it began<br />
The art without borders<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Cushion</b><br />
<br />
When the shoulders are tired<br />
And the burden is too much<br />
<br />
When the world is against you<br />
And obstacles as such<br />
<br />
Hold my hand and walk with me<br />
I will be your crutch<br />
<br />
To guide you or to support you<br />
Even if all you need is just a touch<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Sunshine</b><br />
<br />
On a cold morning,<br />
Full of fog and mist<br />
Waiting at the street corner<br />
<br />
Walking ahead,<br />
With your hand in mine, I know<br />
Sunshine is around the corner<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>The spark</b><br />
<br />
The spark that was,<br />
It still is,<br />
Hidden under a layer of clouds<br />
Like a lightning waiting<br />
<br />
The clouds that are,<br />
They won't be<br />
Light can not hide for long<br />
Through the fog it will shine<br />
<br />
The seasons that change,<br />
They will<br />
Guised as a spark<br />
Breaking the monotony<br />
<div><br />
</div></div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-91556554251640416432011-04-04T18:02:00.000-07:002011-04-04T18:02:47.064-07:00Revisiting Pink Floyd<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Wow, it has been a long time since i wrote anything. I think the last post was in August of last year. 7 months with a writer's block.<br />
<br />
A lot has happened (as always, one might say) in these last 7 months. Ups and downs as usual. In fact, i think i got so used to ups and downs, i stopped thinking of these as special events. Hence nothing to overcome my writer's block.<br />
<br />
So why now? Well, no reason. Just that it feels like somehow the block has passed.<br />
<br />
I am here in lab, deciding topics for my orals, reading a bunch of papers and listening to music. Of course you must have guessed by now, i am listening to Pink Floyd. Well, true and false. I am listening to the Pandora Station 'Wish you were here'. Its mainly Pink Floyd, Led Zep and other favourite bands of mine.<br />
<br />
I was listening to 'Brain Damage' by floyd and ironically, at the same time i had the inspiration to write. So to acknowledge that song, i am going to quote a few lines from that song.<br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">And if the dam breaks open many years too soon<br style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />And if there is no room upon the hill<br style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />And if your head explodes with dark forbodings too<br style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />I'll see you on the dark side of the moon</span><br style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" /><br />
<br />
Ok, so revisiting Pink Floyd seems to have done the trick. Hopefully now that i have posted something, i will keep on writing.<br />
<br />
See you on the next post.<br />
So long.</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-84796315586885141932010-10-17T09:05:00.001-07:002010-10-17T09:05:49.912-07:00VindicationFor those of you who have read my last poem, 'defeat', it was about science defeating me in the battle. However i didnt lose hope and kept on fighting. And it paid off.<br />
<br />
When i wrote the poem, i had just come across yet another failed experiment, the same one for which i have been trying to get a positive result since an year ago. But last week, i finally got it. And that is vindication for me...<br />
<br />
That also reminded me why i am in science. The exhilaration i experienced after looking at that piece of gel was exactly the thing i was fighting for. One small gel at the end of the day and that relieved the stress i was going through for the last few months. That is what science is about. I always like saying this 'If everything works for the first time, then a paper would be written in 6 months. But behind every figure in a paper, there are atleast a few failed experiments'. I experienced this firsthand. It is the one experiment which works and kicks off a whole series of further experiments that one always hopes for.<br />
<br />
So with that feeling in mind, i am writing this, not only to remind myself of this in future when i am struggling to get experiments working, but also for my fellow men and women who have taken the challenge of science.<br />
<br />
At the same time, as i said in my poem, science is saying to me 'You may have won the battle, but not yet the war'<br />
<br />
So longHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-74406302266470009732010-09-09T21:06:00.001-07:002010-09-09T21:06:48.761-07:00DefeatI lay down my weapons today<br />
Sweat on brow and blood on sword<br />
In front of the familiar foe<br />
Reminding me how much it cost<br />
<br />
My eyes flaming, matching his,<br />
With vengeance in mind I tell him,<br />
"I might have lost the battle,<br />
But the war is not yet lost"<br />
<div><br />
</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-84126221078319706702010-09-09T21:01:00.001-07:002010-09-09T21:18:25.376-07:00Life out of a laundry basketYou can't tell the difference between new and clean clothes and old and muddled clothes when you live life out of a laundry basket.<br />
<br />
<br />
-This thought is inspired and contributed to by RaginiHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-6368429794228613292010-08-14T19:55:00.000-07:002010-08-14T19:55:01.974-07:00Happy Independence DayHappy Independence Day<br />
<br />
I am writing this blog as we all celebrate 63rd anniversary of the India's independence.<br />
<br />
As the day goes on and i read various facebook statuses, including mine, i am thinking... And i can't help notice a few things.<br />
<br />
I know a lot of people who have come here to the US to study or to work. I know some of them will go back to India, most of them will end up staying here - on a green card and get a citizenship eventually. And they will be good American citizens and will go back to India once a year to visit their family. Now i don't see anything wrong with that - it's a personal choice.<br />
<br />
If you ask me whether i want to do that? My answer right now is: No. Don't get me wrong, i like living in the states, the material comforts, the individual freedom. But i still want to go back.<br />
<br />
I came here to do a PhD.. why didn't i stay in India? Because the opportunities there were limited and i wanted to make myself better at research and start a career in science in a place where they are not limited. So i came to the US. Did i find my dreams coming true? Yes, i joined a university and a lab where i can do the research i want, without a lot of obligations and limitations. I enjoy the freedom, i enjoy the healthy competition, i enjoy the opportunities.<br />
<br />
Now ask me why i want to go back when i know i will be "downgrading" from these if i go back. The answer is: I moved to the US because i saw a potential to freely express my scientist side. But what about other kids in India who couldn't? I went to a place to seek something from a place lacking it. Why shouldn't i bring it back to my home? I am going to go back and eventually have an institute of my own, where i will give my students the same opportunities, the same freedom as i found.<br />
<br />
When i see people commenting on the system being screwed up, and thats why they are staying back in the US, i always shake my head. I think, if you are so critical of the system, why not try and change it? Not everyone has to change it by being a politician, or being an IAS/IPS officer. Not everyone has to get sucked into the system. Why can't everyone think of one area they want to improve and work on it?<br />
<br />
E.g. I was not satisfied with the science-research system in India, so after gaining some experience in both science and scientific culture, i want to go back and instil some of the positive values i learned into the Indian system.<br />
<br />
Well, this is just food for thought. The question I am asking is:<br />
<br />
'Do you want to be a deserter and escape from sufferings of your fellow men; or do you want to be Prometheus who brought fire to the mankind'HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-88282903924766415172010-08-11T23:03:00.001-07:002010-08-11T23:03:45.658-07:00The waitThe wait,<br />
Like the long road before you reach home;<br />
You can see the city lights, but from far<br />
Yet you yearn to go faster..<br />
<br />
The wait,<br />
Knowing very well that time doesn't<br />
Hoping that it will go like a shooting star,<br />
Yet the heart beats for her..<br />
<br />
The wait,<br />
Distance makes hearts grow fonder<br />
They say, and even though you are far,<br />
Love will never wither..<br />
<br />
The wait,<br />
You keep wondering when is the time<br />
One last time, to turn around that sand-jar,<br />
Till it's almost overHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-16308656775223990662010-07-23T14:20:00.000-07:002010-07-23T14:20:57.861-07:00EvanescentYou vanish everytime i reach out, giving just a faint glimpse<br />
Just like the brush of lips before a fleeting kiss<br />
Every glance i try to steal, further you move away, but i look everywhere<br />
Every hint i send, you defy it, but i know you are there somewhere<br />
Oh ever-evading one, please have mercy and show thyself,<br />
So that i can connect and log-in myself<br />
<div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>This is a poem inspired by the flaky wi-fi at Dubai airport.</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-68050806967932967182010-06-30T23:31:00.001-07:002010-06-30T23:31:55.646-07:00HomeA new place in a new world<br />
A place to hold on to<br />
A place to come back to<br />
A silent refuge<br />
A social hub<br />
A consolation in the dark<br />
A celebration of light<br />
A quiet relaxation<br />
A flurry of excitement<br />
A harbor of thought<br />
A sink for grief<br />
A bed to crash on<br />
A bed to be sleepless on<br />
A place that i owned<br />
A place i called home<br />
<br />
<br />
This is a tribute to Weyburn Terrace, Cypress court Apt 404, my apartment in Los Angeles for the last almost 2 years. It was my first home here and will always have a place in my heart.<br />
<br />
GoodbyeHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-9227270922704692522010-06-07T23:20:00.000-07:002010-06-07T23:20:28.124-07:00Hello,<br />
<br />
I am writing after a long time today. I have been in LA for more than a year and half. There is a Starbucks Cafe across the street (or down the hill as i like to call it). One and half years, and i never sat there just for myself.<br />
<br />
Back in India, the canteen on the terrace of the bioinformatics center building used to be my spot. I have sat there countless times and that places has spawned more blogs than any other. I have always thought well with a cup of tea (or in the US, a cup of coffee). May be it is the tea/coffee or just that i am sitting in a place by myself and introspecting. But to remind myself of that, I am sitting here today at Starbucks Cafe with a pen and a notepad and i am writing what ever is coming to my mind.<br />
<br />
One would think that it is the peace that is invoking thoughts in my brain. Ironically, i couldn't have chosen any place worse than this. This Starbucks is right next to the Fox theater in Westwood. The Fox theater is famous for movie premiers. Yes, with red carpet and celebrities. Today they are premiering 'The Karate Kid' and allegedly, Will Smith, Jackie Chan and a few other celebrities are here. So, getting back to the point, at this time the place has loud, talkative fans eager to catch a glimpse of their favorite celebrity. There are black-clothed security persons with stern looks on their faces, but at the same time having a good chat with coworkers. There are swarms of students walking by, it is the finals week. And to add on to that, i am blasting Iron Maiden through my newly acquired earphones. (The only thing missing here is the loud anti-bible screams of my favorite homeless guy).<br />
<br />
You would ask me why i chose such a place for seeking peace of mind. And i say, i don't know, it doesn't probably matter. Peace of mind is something that can be attained irrespective of acoustic peace.<br />
<br />
Dr. Asim Dasgupta (a prof here at UCLA) once told us that if one wants peace of mind, one should focus on the gap between two thoughts. When a though passes and a new one comes to mind, there is a brief gap in which there is no thought at all. If one focuses on that gap, one can attain peace. For me, that state would be harder to attain if there are external distractions around me.<br />
<br />
I think the reason i get peace here, amidst all that is occurring around me is precisely that a lot is occurring around me. It is the state of having too much to potentially think about. Almost like a rainbow-colored wheel of fortune. When still, it shows all the colors. But when i spins, it appears white. My mind seems to attain peace by focusing on nothing particular what so ever.<br />
<br />
So, i attempt to break my writer's block by writing this short "blurt", sitting at my favorite Starbucks, drinking cafe latte, listening to Iron Maiden and occasionally looking at the Fox theater to see if i can get a glimpse of Jada Pinkett-Smith.<br />
<br />
Hence goes the writer's block<br />
<br />
So long.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
p.s. I did not get to see Jada Pinkett-Smith, although i did see Will Smith and their kid Jaden.HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-91635672240537767942010-03-28T12:14:00.000-07:002010-03-28T12:14:24.685-07:00Pichle saat dino me v2.0Ok, now i am a big fan of parodies, given that i like to write them. But i am slightly varying that and writing my own version of a song 'Pichle saat dino me' from the movie 'Rock on'.<br />
<br />
And please keep in mind that all of that is true ! [may be not the chronological order and may be 7 days +/- 2, but hey, since i am a scientist, i am allowed that much SD]<br />
<br />
Pichle saat dino me - v2.0<br />
<br />
"<br />
<br />
mera grocery ka ek bill,<br />
ek ganda hua towel<br />
ek aunty ka phone number<br />
bekar pada ek paper<br />
<br />
mere haat se racquet ka swing<br />
mera ek pipet ka ring<br />
pichle saat dino me maine khoya,<br />
kabhi khudpe hasa mai, mostly roya<br />
<br />
na na, na na na, na na, na na na<br />
<br />
present mili ek kettle<br />
nahi thi koi better<br />
meri jeb se ek sachet<br />
meri raincoat ki jacket<br />
<br />
do seminar ke classes<br />
mere purane spare glasses<br />
pichle saat dino me maine khoya,<br />
kabhi khudpe hasa mai, mostly roya<br />
<br />
na na, na na na, na na, na na na<br />
<br />
kaise bhulu, saatva jo din aaya<br />
kisi ne mujhse facs machine cheen liya<br />
kaisa din tha, jis din maine ek bhi galat kaam nahi kiya tha<br />
<br />
mai jo khilaa pehli baar, maine janaa luck hai yaar<br />
maine hosh bhi khoya, josh bhi khoya,<br />
kabhi khudpe hasa mai, mostly roya,<br />
<br />
maine pichle saat dino me yeh sab hai khoya<br />
"<br />
<br />
<br />
Forgive me, the crew of Rock on.HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-67453726779350836502010-03-20T18:06:00.000-07:002010-03-20T18:12:28.664-07:00The mind wonders<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj275/haironie_91/Abstract.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj275/haironie_91/Abstract.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13px;">"मन चिंती ते वैरी न चिंती"</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: 13px;">Have you ever wondered how our mind can think of the most un-thinkable things? Each and everyone of us has some morals, some set of values that we try our best to live by. But everyone has had thoughts at one point of time which were so against our morals that we wondered 'how could i even think of that'. Have you ever wondered that why our mind can produce so conflicting a stream of thoughts?</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Mind is like a canvas - it will take up any color. At the same time, it has the ability to erase any color it wants. We 'paint' the canvas with beliefs and ideas, but it can be wiped clean even in a single moment. And nothing else but the mind itself does it. A person can lose their beliefs in a second. A person can lose faith in some concept, e.g. faith in god, in one second. A person can lose years' worth of trust in a second. All it takes for such things is one thought by their mind. At the same time, it can only take a second to build new faith / rebuild trust. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Our mind is a strange thing. I say thing because mind is not living. Surely, it is our brain cells etc, but it is the abstract that generates from them, not the actual living entities. It is the software, not the hardware. But it has so profound a control on our hardware that its hard to tell the difference. But i digress.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">I remember a story about king Asoka. He was a great mauryan king who ruled a large part of southeast asia. He ruled it by the mighty and ruthless force. On the battlefield in the war of kalinga, he saw death that he brought to his fellow men and at that moment, something inside him broke down and he swore onto a life of non-violence by following a buddhist way of life. This story illustrates the great power of mind. The same mind, which had developed a huge dam of thoughts for Asoka. The same mind that made him a great king, a conqueror and a great warrior. The same mind that made him choose the complete opposite way of life in one moment. It has such great power, ironically not only on ourselves but on our fellow human beings too. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">"Mind is a terrible master, but a wonderful servant" - Robin Sharma in 'The monk who sold his ferrari'</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Couldn't have been said more aptly. Mind is in fact a terrible master. Of course the example above illustrates that. I am sure all of us have experienced this sometime. Our minds control us, but how many times have you been disappointed with yourself for not making a choice. So many times it happens that our mind acts in such a way that we intentionally make the wrong choices. Sure, we have 'inner voices' telling us what is wrong and what is not. But who are those afterall, figments of our mind ! It is the mind who is acting against itself, sometimes i wonder why? Could it be that, without something like that, mind's own existence will become obsolete?</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">This reminds me of 'Lord of the flies' - an amazing piece of work. Such beautifully written but a horrifyingly natural concept. The behavior of those children on the island was nothing but a terrible interplay of minds. Mind being a terrible master, guided the kids to be 'lords of flies'. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">I was talking to R [i am borrowing her idea of initials] after watching the movie 'Shutter island' about beliefs and psyche in general. And we were saying that a lot of things we believe in are nothing but our mind's imagination. The whole concept of religion is one of them. What is religion and why do we believe in it? Isn't it a concept that our mind either creates or accepts? When i say someone is very religious and monotheistic, that only means that their mind has accepted the concept of monotheism as a reality. Reality is what our mind makes up - our perception.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Which brings us to the mind being a great slave part. Our mind makes a slave out of itself. When people devote themselves to something, it is exactly that. When i say that i am 100% devoted to something and i can only think about that, i am training my mind to exactly the same thing. Or rather, my mind is training itself to do that. The last 'ashram' of a man's life - sanyasashram [संन्यासाश्रम] is nothing but a time period devoted to clearing off the mind and train it to prepare to cease its own existence. How thoughtful of the mind i say.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">So here i am writing about mind. Or shall i say my own mind writing about itself and its fellow minds?</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">I shall end this post with a quote from Ozzy Osbourne [to put it entirely out of context]</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">'Of all the things i have lost, i miss my mind the most'</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Go on, let your minds wonder...</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Bookman old style'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">[image courtesy haironi_91 via photobucket]</span></span>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-87243453466578627722010-03-07T21:36:00.000-08:002010-03-07T21:36:25.257-08:00Growing up / growing oldHello,<br />
<br />
I have been feeling quite strange the last few months. I think its a part of growing up. I see the things around me, i see my friends going through good and bad times. I see people interact with each other. It is a good place to observe. But more than anything else, i feel that i am finally growing up, even growing old.<br />
<br />
The days spent at the University, making jokes, or worrying about stupid problems, or even doing nothing what so ever - seem to be distant past. The carefree-ness that was all i had, is slowly receding. Now i keep thinking of the future, the responsibilities. I see people around me facing choices and making them. And i can't resist thinking about what i would do if i was in their situation - even about how if i would make that choice, it might affect future.<br />
<br />
If anyone asked me a couple of years ago - 'what do you want to do after the Ph.D.?' - my answer would have been easy and simple - 'a post-doc, in Europe'. Now its not the case. Don't think that my answer has changed fundamentally. But it has all these added clauses to it now. 'a post-doc, may be in Europe, may be back in India - depends on what happens - whether i am single or not; depends on what happens in the next 2-3 years'. And as better-thought that is, it also freaks me out a bit. That means i am growing up / growing old. There was a day last year, when i cut my hair [which were 18 inches long that time and i used to tie a ponytail] - and i told myself 'nah, you are not getting too old for that, just that you are annoyed by the maintenance' - while inside, secretly, i knew that there was a part of me which thought that growing my hair is a bit juvenile and may be i am getting old for that. But i tried to shun that fact.<br />
<br />
Now, after a year, after a lot has passed. I can not help but think about the responsibilities. That i have to go back to India, take care of my parents and sister, my whole joint family. That i have to start a family of my own. That i have to prep myself to get married one day, and have children. That i have to start a career in science and make it successful.<br />
<br />
Reading books on philosophy, or books with profound philosophy behind them, i always thought about my values and morals. But spare a few times, i didn't have to face a stringent test of my morals or my values. I started realizing that now it is going to be the true test of those. Not that i am scared of that, but i realize that - perhaps i am getting older.<br />
<br />
My first year in US, i was quite carefree about money - enjoying myself and spending quite a lot - sometimes on useless things. But now, after going through a few crises, i have started putting a bit more thought in that. Things like - i should always have enough for a trip to India, for good or god-forbid bad reasons. I have started becoming pro-active towards saving.<br />
<br />
So, all these things that i keep thinking - they do make me feel older. Perhaps it is time to grow up - but do i want to lose that carefree-ness that i had / still have? Or do i want to cherish it, albeit as past, and move on and look forward to the responsibilities as new challenges that will test me?<br />
<br />
Well, time will decide. After all, Benjamin Button was only a fictional character.<br />
<br />
So long.HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-86623099779789816292010-02-15T22:51:00.000-08:002010-02-15T23:07:30.233-08:00At Crossroads<span style=”font-family:'Bookman Old Style', ‘Bookman Old Style’, serif”><br />
Vast network of roads<br />
<br />
Some well trodden<br />
Some less travelled<br />
Some wide and smooth<br />
Some narrow and bumpy<br />
<br />
Each intersection is a choice<br />
Each intersection leads to another<br />
Each intersection decides the journey<br />
Each intersection decides the end<br />
<br />
Here i am at crossroads again<br />
The road i choose will be my fate<br />
Looking back at the network<br />
Tracing my path i contemplate<br />
<br />
Here i am at crossroads again<br />
Afterall, the end is all the same<br />
<br />
</span>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-13875548787447943902010-02-01T06:03:00.001-08:002010-02-01T06:03:46.190-08:00Peace IIThe road is still quiet<br />
Clear blue sky<br />
A lone white cloud<br />
Shiny grey road<br />
Same car parked<br />
Same eucalyptus scent<br />
Scattered ashes of a cigarette<br />
Fallen leaves<br />
A tiny ray of sun<br />
Seeping through the trees<br />
It is dawn<br />
And the road is still quietHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-55433822384447180162010-01-18T23:33:00.000-08:002010-01-18T23:33:33.132-08:00PeaceThe road is quiet<br />
Patches of dry tar<br />
Patches of clear sky<br />
A faint scent of eucalyptus<br />
Dim streetlamp<br />
A lone man stands<br />
Peacefully smoking<br />
Occasional puff of smoke<br />
Content with himself<br />
Looking at the sky<br />
A parked car<br />
As though sleeping<br />
To wake up at dawn<br />
And break the spell<br />
But for now,<br />
The road is quietHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-60518998235821167202010-01-15T00:53:00.001-08:002010-01-15T00:53:55.372-08:00Phoenix<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Walking on a lonely road</span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Patches of dark, without streetlamps<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">A cemetery beckons<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Ghastly silence hinting at his fate<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">He keeps on walking<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">An act of defiance<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Though in his mind he knows<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">That the battle is already lost<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">The graveyard smirks<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">"Telling him that one day, you shall come to me<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">And that is inevitable"<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">But he throws his head back and laughs,<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">"You think its surrender?<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Its a brave man's battle, fought hard<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">With head held high and glory at helm<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">You shall take me for now,<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">But from the ashes i shall rise again".<br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"> <br />
</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-44857312291847918762010-01-02T08:36:00.000-08:002010-01-02T08:36:30.940-08:00DoodlesPaper in my hand,<br />
A want to write my mind out<br />
I look for the pen,<br />
And something to write about<br />
<br />
Aimless words,<br />
Little sense they seem to make<br />
Aimless thoughts,<br />
About this world, real and fake<br />
<br />
Why fake i say,<br />
Reality is what i see around me<br />
Why write i say,<br />
The thoughts belong to only me<br />
<br />
Pointless rhymes,<br />
My thoughts do wander away<br />
But write i do,<br />
To say what i want to say<br />
<br />
So, this is the cure for my itch,<br />
A few words<br />
Out of my pen and on my paper.<br />
<div><br />
</div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-16452609018736476072009-12-31T20:01:00.000-08:002010-02-15T23:06:01.710-08:00तदेव लग्नं<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">तदेव लग्नं सुदिनं तदेव , ताराबलं चन्द्रबलं तदेव, विद्याबलं दैवबलं तदेव, लक्ष्मिपते तेङ्ग्रियुगं स्मरामि </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">This is the shloka that is spoken at almost each religious custom. What it means [crudely] is:</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">'It is </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">the </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">sacred moment, it is a good day, it has all the power of the moon and the stars [astrological], it has all the power of knowledge and fate when i think of your feet, oh lord Vishnu'</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">So by saying this we proclaim that we are investing all the power of stars, the moon, knowledge and fate at the sacred moment. And whatever we will start at this moment will have the power with it. This is said in a wedding, in a 'munj' and in a 'vastushant' and every such ceremony.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I became fascinated with this shloka during my cousin's wedding. The reason i became fascinated with it because i liked the tone of finality associated with it. It strongly asserts that as of this moment, every material power is with us, and the only thing required now is for us to use our will power and make right whatever we are embarking upon. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">In a wedding, it asserts to the bride and the groom that 'now that you have all of the power invested in you, it is up to you two and only you two to make the wedding succesful'.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">In a munj it tells the munja that 'now that you have all of the power invested in you, it is up to you and only you to make sure that you successfully complete your education in your 'brahmacharyashram' and be ready to enter 'gruhasthashram''.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">So i guess what it says is that it is up to us to make our journey successful assuming that every material power is with us. It also tells us a strange thing - that we dont need a sacred moment to embark upon something - we make this moment sacred by chanting this shloka. The reason this is strange is because we always find the exact sacred moment - muhurta - for a wedding / munj etc.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">This is brings me back to my new years post of 2007 - that why we need a special day. It is a motivation thing - i think finding an appropriate 'muhurta' is for making the moment special - for motivating us to start whatever we want to start. This shloka makes the muhurta redundant by proclaiming that we make whatever moment we want into a muhurta. And that is why this one fascinates me.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">This tells me that we shouldn't rely on stellar support - shouldn't rely on fate to do anything. We must assume that while travelling on the road ahead, we have full support of these things - stars and moon, knowledge and fate - and that the rest in only in our hands. And if anything goes wrong - we must bear the responsibility of it - because its only because our own doing and not the fault of stars.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I have always said this while giving advice to people and tried to follow it myself - in a situation, all we can worry about are the things that are in our control - the rest, which is beyond our control, we should not worry about because there is not a thing we can do about it. This shloka tell me exactly that.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I have been pondering over this for a while - the powerful message which the shloka delivers. So i choose this moment to publish my thoughts and hope that they enlighten me and others. </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 28px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">तदेव लग्नं सुदिनं तदेव , ताराबलं चन्द्रबलं तदेव, विद्याबलं दैवबलं तदेव, लक्ष्मिपते तेङ्ग्रियुगं स्मरामि</span></span>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-24684997150270798222009-12-31T08:40:00.000-08:002009-12-31T08:40:53.978-08:00A travelers logHello,<br />
I am back after a long time - its almost time for my new years blog. So rather than having some arcane philosophical discussion, i am going to transcribe a travel-log here.<br />
<br />
This is the log i wrote - yes, in a notebook - during my journey from LA to Pune and back. I have transcribed it word to word - including the spelling mistakes - my comments while transcribing it are colored grey.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>The journey begins - LA to Pune</b><br />
<br />
-Travel log 12/2 or 2/12 now that i am going back to India<br />
-Long wait at the airport with expensive [3X of normal] food<br />
-Long call with Santya<br />
-Very long struggle to call Deepti @ Malaysia<br />
-Pretty air-hostesses .. warmest service so far<br />
-Announcement in Hindi 'देवियों और सज्जनों ' - first feel of homeland !<br />
-Disappointment at finding out that there is no power outlet<br />
-No stupid safety demos.. instead a corny video with a pretty air-hostess<br />
-Reading light not focusing on my seat<br />
-Bye Bye LA through the window<br />
-Stupidity -- decide that the seat doesnt go all the way down -- tell an airhostess -- she tells me that there is a different button for that :P<br />
-Complimentary OJ/AJ/Water --<span style="color: #444444;"> [here i have written a word which i cant decipher]</span><br />
-Complimentary beer !<br />
-Malaysian airlines -- best so far [except the announcements in some asian language] -- <span style="color: #444444;">[i didnt realize it was malysian :P]</span><br />
-Watching Half Blood Price -- didnt even know the movie was out<br />
-So far the journey is really good -- sitting next to a a very nice family<br />
-Met a girl @ airport -- Speech therapist -- we got talking a bit -- reminds me of Richa<br />
-HP and HBP -- why dont they stick to the book?<br />
-I smell fish<br />
-Too many announcements during the movie<br />
-Movie boring<br />
-Nice meal -- wine with meal, i dont take wine<br />
-Hot tea instead of coffee - sounded similar<br />
-Good long sleep<br />
-Wake up -- potato bun<br />
-Forgot to bring toothbrush and moisturizer<br />
-Watching Ice Age-Dawn of the Dinosaurs<br />
-Good breakfast of scrambled eggs<br />
-Plane movement -- coffee spills<br />
-Found out that the toilets have toothbrushes and toothpaste !<br />
-Land @ Taipei - disembark<br />
-@ Taipei airport -- Duty free stuff too expensive<br />
-1 US$ = 32 Taiwan$<br />
-Back to the plane !<br />
-Again food -- hungry, so will eat anything<br />
-On KL airport<br />
-Found a terminal -- check mail !<br />
-Wait for the girls -- Asha and Aditi to finish their stuff <span style="color: #444444;">[here i should explain that Aditi is the girl i met at the airport, Asha is one my my friends here who was also taking the same flight -- i didnt know about that earlier]</span><br />
-Tried calling Deepti -- failed<br />
-Rush to Immigration -- dont want Deepti to wait long<br />
-Talk to a girl -- Laxmi in the imm. line -- she looks charmed by me :P<br />
-Immigration clear -- transit pass<br />
-Eager to meet Deepti -- but cant find her<br />
-Calling her -- cant seem to<br />
-Currency exchange -- 1US$ = 3.32 Ringetts <span style="color: #444444;">[the actual spelling is Ringitts and the abbreviation is RM]</span><br />
-Calling Deepti again - cant get through<br />
-Eat at BK -- just for internet access <span style="color: #444444;">[BK is burger king]</span><br />
-Last try to contact Deepti - failed<br />
-Go to shuttle stop and take shuttle to hotel<br />
-Nice room -- coffee !! and wifi<br />
-Comp runs on 2% battery for half an hour -- miracle<br />
-Laptop conks off -- realized that there is a power outlet!<br />
-तहान लागल्यावर विहीर खोदने <span style="color: #444444;">[Suddenly i had an inspiration and started writing in marathi -- forgive me for the errors of transliteration]</span><br />
- बैग मधे टूथब्रुश मिळाला !<br />
-मस्त आंघोळ केली<br />
-आता उकदतय थोड<br />
-15 km / j [?] अशी पाटी होती<br />
-परतीच विमान<br />
-एअरपोर्ट वर 'Malaysian street food' -- ठीक ठाक होत<br />
-परत आदिती भेटली<br />
-विमानात बसल्या बसल्या झोप<br />
<br />
The return journey begins - Pune to LA<br />
<br />
-Another round of farewells @ home -- this time its much worse<br />
-Met some of my best friends -- Swati, Rahul, Monica, Nikhil, Richa -- going back atleast with that satisfaction<br />
-Journey to Bombay -- Sumo<br />
-Fell asleep in car -- made the driver sleepy -- not good<br />
-Stop @ Kamat again<br />
-Lot of traffic<br />
-Reach airport<br />
-Took a walk to restroom -- alone<br />
-Some time toe prepare myself for the departure<br />
-Try to remain calm and smile<br />
-Finally in<br />
-Long wait @ counter<br />
-Met everyone at visitors gallery -- made me feel like a prisoner visiting his relatives thru a meshed window<br />
-Immigration and security done<br />
-Eat a 100Rs sandwich and 100Rs cold coffee<br />
-Making final calls<br />
-Finally boarded -- sit on the wrong seat -- american couple makes me get up -- stupidity of mine<br />
-Sit next to a a guy with 3 kids<br />
-a pretty girl sitting behind me -- she has a sad kind of look<br />
-Think of writing the log <span style="color: #444444;">[ok, i started writing at this point - so the stuff on the return journey till now is flashback]</span><br />
-Started reading the LA to Pune log -- got remined <span style="color: #444444;">[reminded]</span> of reading light -- checked -- does focus on my seat -- no troubles there<br />
-Damn ! my seat is too far from the toilet<br />
-Announcement 'Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls and Enrich members' !<br />
-Again 'देवियों और सज्जनों' -- this time the feeling is of longing<br />
-Free beer again<br />
-Shouldnt have had lime with soda -- stomach acting weird<br />
-White wine with dinner -- not bad<br />
-No coffee with dinner :(<br />
-Watching House<br />
-Slept off<br />
-Landed @ KL -- familiar territory<br />
-Amazing how much the comfort level @ at a place increases <span style="color: #444444;">[i have drawn an arrow pointing up]</span> once you have been there before<br />
-Malaysian toilets are pretty bad <span style="color: #444444;">[i wrote worst - and rubbed it off not to be too critical]</span><br />
-Sitting @ a cafe 'Delifrance' -- apparently french<br />
-Finally some coffee and water<br />
-1US$ = 3.27RM<br />
-डोक्यात विचारांच थैमान सुरु आहे<br />
-मराठीत लिहिल्यामुले अस वाटतय की रोज काहीतरी मराठीतून लिहाव<br />
-Search for chewing gum -- 'दात घासन्याची गोळी'<br />
-Go to a duty free chocolate shop -- no gum<br />
-Go to a pharmacy -- happydent white<br />
-Another security check -- cant take water in -- what a waste<br />
-Guard asks to open bag -- momentary freakout<br />
-Tried calling Deepti again! -- not in service<br />
-Imagined the scene @ immigration in LA -- why am i freaking out?<br />
-लिहायचा मूड नाहीये -- आत्तापर्यंत झोपून होतो<br />
-Landed @ Taipei<br />
-Toilets are cleaner and bigger<br />
-It is cold inside the terminal<br />
-1US$ = almost 38 Taiwan$<br />
-A girl traveling to LA giving me looks -- caught her looking @ me a couple of times<br />
-Parle poppins after ages -- still the same taste<br />
-Same kind of restlessness<br />
- I guess after a year, LA has become 'home away from home' -- Santya's term<br />
-Just realized that i have a habit of keeping a copy of my itin in my left pocket -- i guess useful<br />
-12 more hours to LA<br />
-Set clock @ LA time<br />
-Watching district 9 -- weird movie -- 'alien trans-species prostitution' -- what a horrible concept<br />
-Bumpy ride -- very bumpy<br />
-One bump was so bad that a small plea of forgiveness came to my mind<br />
-The lady sitting next to me is very scared -- holds my hand -- almost crying<br />
-We talk -- she turns out to be facutly @ USC -- works on HIV !<br />
-The world is so small<br />
-Bumps over<br />
-Slept through most of it<br />
-Bored by now -- i thik <span style="color: #444444;">[think]</span> long flights are useful in killing all the feelings of leaving home<br />
-Almost there in LA<br />
-Finally got coffee ! but the bumps start again<br />
-Watch a corny video of CBP about carrying food<br />
-Immigration and customs cleared -- no probs there<br />
-Waiting for flyaway<br />
-Its raining and its cold<br />
-Journey from warm and sunny Pune to cold and cloudy LA is over<br />
-So long<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Phew -- that was a long blog.<br />
<br />
Alright, hope its readable and hope you dont fall asleep by the end of it.<br />
<br />
So this is it for my new years blog for now - will get back soon - have so many topics to write about.<br />
<br />
Happy New Year everyone !HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-64178302107471217772009-12-01T18:36:00.000-08:002009-12-01T18:36:38.136-08:00Through one's eyes<a href="http://im.rediff.com/money/2009/jul/symbol-of-law.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://im.rediff.com/money/2009/jul/symbol-of-law.jpg" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 350px; margin: 0 0 10px 10px; width: 277px;" /></a><br />
"You see the world being dark when you see it through dark glasses"<br />
<div><br />
<div>I read this saying somewhere, i may not have remembered it accurately, but in essence it is right.<br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>The line talks about one's perception of things. And through experience, some good and some bad, i have come to realize that there is a vast difference between perception and reality ; and most of the times, perception holds more importance over reality. <br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>Take the example of a court case - the evidence is reality , the crime is reality - however, the way the crime is punished [the actual function of the law] is based on perception. In American system, the members of jury decide whether the accused is guilty or not. Its based on their perception of the evidence and the case made by the lawyers. [It is perhaps a great thing that the Indian law - no matter what the actual thing is - has the symbol of the law 'goddess' with a set of scales in her hand and a blindfold over her eyes - to make sure that the justice given is free from the bias of perception]<br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>Perception plays a far more important role in our lives. A lot of people have the tendency to see things as ' black or white ' or 'good or bad'. While it may be easier for the person to handle that, its not really good for them. When one sees things in black or white, they lose out on the true colors of life. One has to realize that things are never that extreme - they are always in different colors / shades. Sandip Khare and Salil Kulkarni have written in one of their poems<br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>'' प्रत्येकाच्या मनातून कुठला तरी राग , प्रत्येकाच्या चंद्रावर कुठला तरी डाग "<br />
<br />
But what people try to do is to classify things as totally bad - black or totally good - white. And this leads to expectations. E.g. someone who's clasisified as 'white' would always be expected to do everything perfectly - they cant slip even once - or they are re-classified as 'black'. But that is not the way things work in life, is it? It's true the other way round as well. Someone who has done something bad and is classified as 'black' will no longer be expected to do any good - and even if they do, its hard to redeem themselves.<br />
<br />
The point i am trying to make is that one should see things as they are - more objective, and less biased - then only one can know the reality. People usually fall in either of the two categories 'optimistic' or 'pessimistic' - why isnt there a third category 'realist'. I have always considered myself a realist - i prefer not to be either optimistic or pessimistic about things - i prefer to see things as they are. People may think i'm either opti/pessimistic depending on their own perception of the situation, but for me its being a realist. But this brings us to the paradox with which i'll end the post.<br />
<br />
When i say i see the real thing, its through my eyes - is that not my perception?<br />
</div><div><br />
<br />
</div></div>HellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-87511315725802364022009-11-15T13:03:00.000-08:002009-11-15T13:05:18.137-08:00Cloning bloody cloningOk, now its Black Sabbath's turn<br /><br />Forgive me Ozzy, Iommi, Butler and Ward<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Cloning bloody cloning</span><br /><br />you've seen plates through distressed eyes<br />you know you had to burn<br />the execution of your plans<br />did really have to turn<br />the day is done, the plates are old<br />the boss begins to show<br />the truth is out the boss is mad<br />but you don't want to know<br /><br /><br />nobody will ever let you clone<br />when your ask the reasons why<br />they just tell you that you're on your own<br />fill your cells all full of crap<br /><br />the bacteria who have crippled you<br />you want to see them grow<br />the gates of lab are closed on you<br />and now there's no return<br />you're wishing that the hands of tech<br />would take your problem away<br />and you dont care if you don't see again<br />the light of day<br /><br />nobody will ever let you clone<br />when your ask the reasons why<br />they just tell you that you're on your own<br />fill your cells all full of crap<br /><br /><br />where can you run to?<br />what more can you do?<br />no colonies tomorrow<br />labwork is killing you<br />dreams turn to nightmares<br />death turns to cells<br />burned out with experimentation<br />nothing more to plate<br /><br />everyone around you<br />mocks at the cloning too<br />god knows and your boss knows<br />no more BLAST for you<br />cloning bloody cloning<br />nothing more in life<br />cloning just for living<br />living just for cloningHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8305475042904521506.post-31749927582068651182009-10-28T15:11:00.001-07:002009-10-28T15:11:46.817-07:00The wanderer<span style="font-weight: bold;">The wanderer</span><br /><br />through space and time<br />he wanders on and on<br /><br />finds a place to settle<br />calls it home<br />does calling it,<br />make it home?<br /><br /><br />finds peace, finds joy<br />finds sadness too<br />finds friend, finds foe<br />doesnt know if all of it is true<br /><br />the moment arrives<br />when he has to depart<br />and he leaves everything<br />falling apart<br /><br /><br />doesn't care about what is left<br />doesn't look back<br />his mind clear<br />he can see only the path<br /><br />he keeps on walking, all alone<br />in solitude and in pain<br />until he reaches a new place<br />to call home again<br /><br />paradise found - paradise lost<br />through space and time<br />he wanders on and onHellBound but Still Divinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09877343721206105829noreply@blogger.com1